I refuse to hide behind the mask and choose to reveal the truth

My mentor (whom I do consider as one of my greatest idols) Anton Diaz told me that leaving the comforts of the corporate life is not easy. And for those who think I am living the life and really taking it so easy…I am not.

I most definitely enjoying. I will share the advantages of freelancing in a separate post. But in true Wais fashion, FIRST, I want to share with you the challenges, before all the glitz and glamour of freelancing.

It’s been almost 6 months, this coming March (WOW! Ang bilis pala!) and these are the things that have been a constant tug of war in my head and heart (until this very moment)…

The Battle of Deviation and Conformity

I know I was born a non-confirmist but somewhere down the road, I just decided to be like everyone else. Because maybe I didn’t want to catch too much attention. Because maybe I just wanted other people to be happy with my decisions. Because maybe I wanted to be accepted by everybody else.

Of course, last October, I definitely took a BIG LEAP to leave my corporate job with a multinational media agency working with global clients and a high paying salary. An opportunity coveted my many people in the normal world. My parents and special someone were (and still are) flabbergasted at the idea of leaving my position with the very bright future in the corporate world at my feet.

I know that their concern is because they love me. But I just want to be happy, happier and happiest because this is what I think I need at the moment…It is different because I am different. Is that so hard to understand?

The Battle of Confidence and Doubt

I mentioned that Confidence is one of the must have mindsets when choosing to do freelancing. Again, I must admit this is not one of my strongest suits. I think it is one of my weakest, if not the weakest. Sadness Each day, I see Doubt creeping over my shoulder and whispering in my ear: “Kaya mo ba talaga? Are you even worthy?”

I do my best to try to shake it off and do my daily I AM CONFIDENT affirmations in front of the bathroom mirror. I also try to surround myself with people who truly believe in me, wishing that it would rub off of me.

Do you know how else I can build and boost my self confidence?

The Battle of For Love or For Money

This is the toughest. I now finally admit to myself that the biggest mistake in taking the leap is not being 100% financially prepared for it. I would recommend for one to have 6-months of day-to-day living funds + emergency funds (just in case something happens…knock on wood) + extra savings tucked into place + irregular regular source/s of income. But then again, when in life are we always 100% prepared right? We only live once and best to try and learn from experience.

Fairly recently, I have received offers left and right from my former employers and colleagues. Yes, ang haba ng hair ko! In fernez! I am often very tempted to eat my words, swallow my pride and get back into the comfort zone of earning a regular salary. It is hard. Even though I do know that the good Lord has been very good to me and never failed to provide for my needs, I still entertain these thoughts into my messed up head. Hehehe.

HAAAY. This is the world I choose to live in and I still do not regret taking the leap. Again, sabi nga ng kanta: “Nobody said it was easy…”

So to all the freelancers out there: are you facing the same battles I am going through?

Live Wais-ly,

Juana B. Wais